I often read about what it’s like from the client’s experience working with a therapist. I thought it might be interesting to know what it’s like seeing clients from a therapist’s prospective.
Since I started seeing clients back when I was training at TCCR some 25 years ago, I’ve always found it a privilege to be let into the internal lives of the people sitting opposite me. My experience and feelings have changed considerably over the years from those early days. I now find it less stressful and far more enjoyable due to a confidence gained from my experience. There is a freeing up; a sense of exploration rather than a ‘getting it right’ need. The way I work has evolved throughout the years and has brought me to a more relaxed and creative place.
My clients bring a variety of issues to therapy and working with individuals and couples with fertility and sexual problems demands different approaches and skills. The work is the same; it’s about being present with clients and hearing their stories and their struggles. Some issues are more difficult to hear and touch me profoundly. I notice this and let the feeling pass so I am able to engage in a more objective and positive way. Still, I feel my client’s pain and it affect me.
There are some clients I establish better relationships with than others. This tells me that something is going on and needs to be acknowledged and worked with. It’s always an opportunity for the two/three of us to understand what these feelings might be about and work through them. Sometimes it doesn’t work out and after trying together we agree to stop the therapy. My feeling is that not everyone is compatible and this goes for the client/therapist relationship.
I wake up most every working day and recognize how lucky I am doing what I do. I look forward to seeing my clients and yes, I am very fond of them. It’s a relationship, maybe not a conventional one but one that I am very much invested in and value enormously. I hope my clients feel the same.